my life became 600% better when i started acting like a self obsessed piece of shit like 10/10 would recommend
even if u don’t actually genuinely love yourself its fuckin fun to act like you think you’re the human embodiment of perfection go on try it life’s too short to not fall in love with yourself
pool party at my house bring your own pool
Knowledge is knowing that Frankenstein is not the monster.
Wisdom is knowing that Frankenstein is the monster.
my dad is a cop and i just called him and he was like “hey i have a 17 year old boy in the back of my cop car right now that i’m running him to the station” and i asked if he was cute and my dad said “Hey, my daughter wants to know if you’re cute” and the guy said “i want to say yes, sir” and my dad started laughing so hard
Harry Potter AU in which Remus Lupin doesn’t leave Hogwarts after Snape tells everyone he’s a werewolf
instead, he fucking stays
where he belongs
and, as the howlers start coming, insults exploding at the teacher’s table every morning like clockwork, the students take notice. They see Lupin’s face, and he’s not even angry, he looks fucking resigned to it, like he deserves it.
So, the students take matters into their own hands.
"You’re the best teacher EVER" is heard on a Monday morning, followed by a “We really like your classes” on Tuesday and “Thanks for being such a cool guy. AND FOR THE CHOCOLATES” on Wednesday.
by Friday, things have escalated to the point that you can’t go ten minutes without a howler bursting and showering Lupin in compliments.
(It’s a whole month before the fateful “YOU HAVE A VERY CUTE ASS, 10/10 WOULD BANG! ” and the subsequent banning of all howlers for the teachers.
Snape has never looked more constipated in his life.)